Success is the result of confidence, just as much as competence. Yet, many strong and intelligent women continue to focus on proving competence, over developing confidence. Often, women tend to feel confident only when they are perfect. Perfectionism is a confidence killer. Attempting to be perfect is really about seeking approval and since perfection is unachievable, it actually erodes confidence.
Risk taking, failure and perseverance are essential to building confidence. Confidence and action are interrelated. When we hesitate because we aren’t sure, we hold ourselves back. Women tend to over-think, instead of taking action. We are hard on ourselves, we focus on being liked over being heard, and where we lack instead of our gifts.
The formula for building confidence:
1) Bite off more than you can chew. Focus on the talent and experience you bring to any situation, and trust you will figure the rest out as you go.
2) Practice courage. Do what scares you, and often. Courage is foundational for building confidence and passion is your fuel. Courage is a muscle and grows by utilizing it. Feel the fear and saddle up anyway.
3) Be resilient. Be decisive, take risks, be willing to fail fast and fail often, this is how you will ultimately create success.
4) Be authentic. Don’t pretend you are perfect, let your guard down, show you are human. Be the true you, be sincere, be imperfect. It makes us all more approachable.
5) Show vulnerability. It’s a strength, not a weakness. You have to be brave to be vulnerable, to allow yourself to be truly seen.
Living your life with confidence will always lead you to a happier you. When you pursue happiness, success is certain to follow. Most of us have been taught this backwards; we pursue success in hopes of finding happiness. Developing happiness is where the magic is found and success will flow naturally.
Lisa Marie Jenkins is a professional speaker and executive coach specializing in feminine leadership. Prior to launching her own corporate leadership training company Lisa spent over 20 years in senior sales and marketing roles at Fortune 500 companies. For more information check out her book WAKE UP, BEAUTY! It’s Not About The Prince