I hate it when that nasty self-limiting belief crawls out from under its rock and sits on my shoulder. I especially hate it when it rears its ugly head just when I’m thinking about doing something out of my comfort zone and I really want to do well.
“Do I deserve that new job? Do I deserve to be successful? Do I deserve to be happy? Do I deserve that loving relationship? Do I deserve to ace that presentation?” Times when I hesitate I need to re-examine my self-esteem and be really honest with myself.
I’ve found that fear born of not feeling good enough, affects absolutely everything in life.
We may settle for a job we hate and doesn’t pay enough because we think that we aren’t brilliant enough or tough enough to take on a greater or better role. We may remain in a relationship that makes us unhappy because we think that we don’t deserve to be treated in a way that makes us feel good about ourselves. We may not allow ourselves to let go and enjoy a new relationship because we are afraid we don’t deserve it. We may say, “No” to things that may be what we desperately need for our personal growth.
We may avoid taking that first step to make the positive changes that will improve our lives. If we don’t believe we deserve it, we aren’t going to do it.
Something to remember:
We were born into the world kicking and screaming demanding to be taken care of, to be fed and to be loved. We expected it. If we received the love and attention we deserved, the world was a warm and wonderful place to be. If we didn’t, the world seemed a cold place and our self-limiting belief given the chance to grow. Sometimes, even with the greatest amount of love and attention, stuff can still happen to make us doubt ourselves. Do you believe you deserve what you hope for?
I believe we were born with the ability to overcome challenges. I believe we all deserve to be treated with respect. I believe we already have all the resources we need, or we can create the resources we need to be successful and happy. There are no un-resourceful people; there are only un-resourceful states of mind.
Let’s get rid of the fear of not being good enough. Recently I delivered, for the second time, my talk, “Face Your Fears for a Life Less Ordinary.” Last month, the first time I presented this to a group of almost 100 finance people as a lunchtime speaker, I was afraid. I was asked to present ‘My Story.’ I didn’t think I was interesting enough or good enough to deliver such a story.
However, the incredible response I received proved me wrong. When someone in the audience asked me to present the exact same talk to another group of finance professionals in her team, I realised that I did have a story to tell that resonates with others. There are many of us who need to Face our Fears for a life less ordinary! Will you?